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Author Topic: A wee joke.  (Read 332 times)
Doug
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« on: Thursday June 21 2018 17:04:39 AEST PM »

A man is stumbling through the woods ,totally drunk,when he comes,upon a preacher baptizing people in the river.
He proceeds into the water,subsequently bumping into the preacher.The preacher turns around and is almost overcome by the smell of alcohol,where upon,he asks the drunk "Are you ready to find Jesus?"
The drunk shouts "Yes i am!"
So the preacher grabs him in the water.He pulls him back and asks"brother, have you found Jesus?"
The drunk replies "No ,I haven't found Jesus.
The preacher shocked at the answer,dunks him in again but for a little longer.He pulls him out of the water and asks "Have you found Jesus,brother?"
The drunk answers "No , I haven't found Jesus!"
By this time the preacher is at his wits end and dunks the drunk again- but this time holds him down for about 30 seconds and when he begins kicking  his arms and legs about,he pulls him up.
The preacher again asks the drunk "For the love of God ,have you found Jesus?!"
The drunk staggers upright,wipes his eye,coughs up a bit of water, catches his breath and says to the preacher"Are you sure this is where he fell in?"
doug smile
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algore_rhythm
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« Reply #1 on: Monday July 29 2019 20:59:04 AEST PM »

 Clap Hands Nice one Doug
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Cliff
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« Reply #2 on: Tuesday July 30 2019 18:05:06 AEST PM »

Brilliant!
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Huego
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« Reply #3 on: Wednesday July 31 2019 10:43:15 AEST AM »

Thanks Doug 

I needed that  happy face
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Views expressed are without prejudice, in the public/consumer interest & their "right to know". Huego reserves his right to: think freely & speculate, make & correct his mistakes, change his mind, expose fools & denigrators if/as required. Fighting greed & injustice with facts as he sees them.
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« Reply #4 on: Thursday August 1 2019 01:33:59 AEST AM »

good one Doug!

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

The Bank Deposit

A man walks into a bank and goes up to the counter,

"I want to open a f*****ing checking account."

The banker is completely shocked at what she heard, "Sir, could you please not use that kind of language in here."

"What's your problem. All I want to do is open a f*****ing checking account!"

"Sir, please calm down."

"That's it, let me talk to your f*****ing manager!"

The banker goes to the back and tells the manager about the unruly customer.

"Don't worry, I'll handle this," the manager reassured her.

"Is there something wrong sir? I'll have you know that I will not tolerate any disrespect toward my employees as I personally hired every single one of them." the manager said confidently.

"What the f****ck is your problem?! All I want to do is open a f*****ing checking account and deposit a million dollars."

After a long pause the manager asked, "Is this bitch giving you any trouble?"

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx



The last support payment


Today is my baby girl's 18th birthday. I be so glad that this be my last child support payment! Month after month, year after year, all those payments!

So I call my baby girl, LaKeesha, to come to my house, and when she get there,

I say: "Baby girl, I want you to take this check over to yo momma house and tell her this be the last check she ever be gettin' from me, and I want you to come back and tell me the 'spression on yo mama's face."

So, my baby girl take the check over to her momma. I be anxious to hear what she say, and bout the 'spression on her face.

Baby girl came back and walk through the door, I say, "Now what yo momma say 'bout that?"

She say to tell you that "you ain't my daddy" ...and watch the 'spression on yo face.

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Global capital is ruining your life?
You have right to self-defence!
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